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10am: Wife and I are speeding the mean streets of suburbia en route to the matinee showing of “Twilight,” the apparent heir apparent to the Harry Potter throne of nerdish literature obsession and fantasy-lite followers everywhere. Everything in me screams that this thing is going to suck. Being a vampire movie, the pun isn’t lost on my wife, who laughs every time I say that. We’re meeting her work buddies, who are all female and all fans of the books. I’m expecting their boyfriends and husbands to share the same lost look I’ll have, our gazes wandering to posters of the upcoming Punisher movie and politely smiling while they swoon at press photos of Twilight’s cast.

Maybe this little jaunt will give me clarity to recognize why this thing came out of nowhere to suck up the minds and hearts of Hot Topic consumers everywhere. Maybe this will just make me want to see the new Punisher movie. Maybe I should just eat my popcorn, endure, and use the experience as Cohabitation Credit toward one day of uninterrupted Xbox gaming. Anyways, we arrive, park, pay, and we’re strapped in for monster melodrama. On with the show!

Wikipedia says:

Capri Pants (”capris”) are a style of pants usually worn in warm weather. They are designed to end mid-calf or just below the calf. More recently, the length of the pants has been shortened to just below the knee in some designs. Though capri pants are most popular with women, they have become popular among men in many countries, especially Europe.

Eventually the Web 2.0 babies grow up and need to start making money. Yelp is no exception, as they recently hired an aggressive sales staff to bring in more ad revenue. Apparently, these salesmen are also making lofty promises that go against the whole point of a user-review site. They’re offering to move negative reviews to the bottom for businesses that advertise on the site. Shady!

Riding the “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” train, Office Max has brought back the annual holiday hit Elf Yourself. This year’s version is powered by JibJab and enables more sharing/embedding features than ever before. After the jump you can check out Jim Tressel, Dan, Anisha, Albert, and myself disco dancing as elves.

Hear that boiling noise? That curse word uttered through clenched teeth? That’s a frustrated gamer, kids.

In gaming, frustration builds to either a controller being thrown across the room or a game disc being snapped in two, left to fester under the entertainment center like Dust Bunny Prime. These moments occur when faced with insurmountable odds, usually a rush of Nazis, zombies, demons, or anthropomorphic mushrooms that turn the game into a mess of button mashing or hurried strategy. It sucks, sure, but getting through the chaos offers the satisfaction of beating the odds and turning the virtual tide (and, usually, 10 achievement points).

In rare cases, though, it offers a unique joy. A moment found in certain games that recharges the batteries better than any can of Bawlz guarana drink ever could. That special moment is the Tank Level, where frustration turns to elation and s**t blows up to the solitary cheers of the gaming enthusiast.